What is sapiosexual? In a generation where the term sapiosexual is being thrown around like confetti, it is best to pause and retrace the steps to the origin of the word. Sapiosexual is a person who is drawn by the intelligence, knowledge, sagacity a person possesses. These people are not attracted by corporeal images, disposition, or any other peculiarity but solely from the complex forms of evaluating a person begets. Their version of foreplay can be a steamy debate or a profound and meaningful conversation. The catchword came to the limelight in the mid-year of 2014 on a talk show addressing attraction and relationships. Ever since then many individuals have been utilizing the word in various contexts in their private and public life. From candidly replacing their profile bio to a sapiosexual related quote or by dropping the “S” bomb on a first date. This can be beneficial for a partner who’s the ideal person should be a being of intellect but then again in my opinion it can be a sign of a red flag.
Why would someone blatantly express of them being a sapiosexual when they meet anyone new without verifying who they are by engaging in an intriguing conversation? When people tend to be straight forward by using terms as such it seems very pretentious and hence raises all my red flags about a person’s authenticity. Keeping my doubts and inquiries about such people aside for a while, I will draw my attention to the psychology behind such attractions. If we go into an in-depth analysis of attraction there are diverse psychological, scientific, fictitious, ancestral, cultural beliefs of forms of attractions including the recently brought out theory of the law of attraction. Scientific research shows that it can be a form of natural selection for reproduction which is the fundamental basis of Darwin’s theory. On the other hand, it can be a mere fascination for smart and talented people in general. If it was up to me to furnish an interpretation it would be the necessity to have a partner who is capable of holding an engaging and stimulating conversation, discussion, or even a very disputatious debate over a political, sociological, etc matter. Having a great physique can be one person’s cup of tea but it’s not mine, possessing a unique personality can be intriguing… for a while as it too can vary but what is timeless in my evaluation is a person who is constantly in the quest for knowledge, insatiable thirst, and greed for answers. This, in the long run, devises and maintains conversations and when seeing myself in a 10 or 20 year’s time I do not see myself not being able to sustain an open-minded discussion with the person I would claim to relish.
In a context where I grew up being able to have long conversations that are both argumentative and insightful with my father on a daily basis, I truly enjoy a person who is able to fill me up with unconventional ideologies that would raise my eyebrows. As a child seeing all my father’s ideologies being scrutinized by everyone around him made me question a lot of things but growing up with such clashing opinions made me immune to radical notions making me crave to hunt for more facts, information, or even people that would give me that feeling of thrill, rush and excitement of being in non-stereotypical conversations. Being able to hold such conversations requires a lot of research and study as well as a unique set of exposure which makes encountering people who have that sort of mentality arduous to discover. It is fairly true that wisdom and experience come with maturity because there is hardly anyone in my age category I can relate to or build a relationship in such a manner. Therefore, making people who have such a mentality, especially men a luxury.
Concluding this I will deliver a brief quotation from a tale I read of the destitute yet the very relatable narrative of Othello by William Shakespeare. Despite Othello being an aged moor ( African in a racist society) and Desdemona being the Senator’s daughter who is more than half the age younger to Othello fell in love with Othello.
“My heart’s subdued
Even to the very quality of my lord:
I saw Othello’s visage in his mind,
And to his honor and his valiant parts
Did I my soul and fortunes consecrate”
She candidly speaks out to his father about the reason she fell in love with the Moor. She saw his face in his mind as said by the third line of the quote. A young lady reared in a society where all the gentlemen had curly blonde hair, blue eyes, and rosy lips she fell in love with the dark, tall and wise man who can enthrall her with all his life experiences.